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No Justification

Hi, and how are you? I have had a couple of really busy weeks. Fortunately, I was the creator of my increased activity level and now, I'm consciously taking it a little easy for a few days. How 'bout you?

This week's Seed took me by surprise. My weekly output is a collaborative effort between my assistant and me. Sometimes I'll send her an idea for The Seed and it gets lost in the shuffle for a while. I had completely forgotten about this one. I'm sure it showed up in perfect and elegant timing. It definitely got me thinking.  Here it is, as a reminder:

"Let go of justification.

It's just another form of 'blaming' 

and becoming the victim."

Google defines justification as the action of showing something to be right or reasonable. It goes on to use the examples: the justification of revolutionary action and there is no moral or legal justification for the way they behaved. The first thing I thought of was when kids do something they shouldn't have done, a common justification is, "Everyone else is doing (or did) it." It doesn't make it right, but hopefully they can get away with it.  This is simply a way of not assuming personal responsibility. As kids, we want to blame our friends for somehow "making" us do something. 

When we are children, we need to be allowed to make mistakes. It's the way we eventually make sense of the world. Hopefully, we learn from our mistakes. If we don't we'll carry our skewed sense of the world into adulthood. If we do that, we try to justify all kinds of things, especially cheating ... on our taxes, on our partners, on our diets ... and the list can go on and on. If we still feel that "everyone else is doing it, so I can too", we're only cheating ourselves. There's no integrity in doing something we probably know isn't right and blaming it on someone else or the culture or society. 

Mahatma Gandhi said, "Be the change you wish to see in the world." If you think you're about to do something that does not line up with your values, take a minute to check with your wise, inner self.  Think about the people you know who are "getting away" with conning people or the system. Do you really admire them? Would you like to be more like them? Or, would you rather have people think of you as honest and trustworthy? You don't have to do what someone else is doing if it makes you uncomfortable.

As author, sociologist, life coach, and speaker Martha Beck says, you can get in touch with your own true, north star. It will guide you on a path toward your best self -- this is what I wish for you. 

Having some hiccups in your life journey? I've got two spots open if you're tired of figuring it out all on your own. Send me an email and we'll talk.

Sparkles and Love,


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About the Author




Barbara L Cummings, MS, RN

is a sassy Queen-ager whose mission is to co-create a happier, healthier life with and for others.

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