Acceptance, Courage, & Wisdom

Hello, dear Reader, it's me again. I love sitting down to write to you, although I sometimes have conflicts of interest regarding my time. I have the most wonderful assistant who has been with me for more than 10 years! I don't always make it easy for her, and I want you to know that if it weren't for Michelle, you might not be reading this. Thank you, Michelle, for everything you do for me and with me. 

Grant me the serenity

to accept the things I cannot change, 

the courage to change the things I can,

and the wisdom to know the difference.

In the early 1930's, a theologian named Reinhold Niebuhr wrote the "Serenity Prayer" (above). About ten years later, Alcoholics Anonymous adopted it as a foundation for recovery from alcohol, and it spilled over to all 12-step programs. I became acquainted with it during my search for meaning, connection, and spirituality along with meditation, exploration of the religions of the world, and straight up psychotherapy. In fact, I'm still and always looking for a deeper understanding of life and my place in all of it. 

I've written about this before -- I am a seeker, curious about so many things. I feel like I have always been like this and why change now?!? I learn something new almost every day. Looking for the significance in and of life has been rewarding and infinitely interesting. I bump into things that do not resonate with me, like man-made religions (with the emphasis on "man"), and then there are other avenues I will blissfully follow. The Serenity Prayer caught my eye and to this day helps me recalibrate. 

The first part about the serenity to accept the things I cannot change -- that is a biggie. For a long time I felt justified in raging about things I could not change. All my fury did nothing for them to be altered or go away. In fact, the more I expressed my wrath, the bigger they became. The really weird thing is that as soon as I learned to be even a little accepting, those offenses shrank and finally fizzled out. There are still times when I feel justified in my outrage, and sometimes it is necessary if it provokes helpful action.

Next, the courage to change the things I can -- seems like that would be easy, but not necessarily. If I get caught up in even a little bit of "people pleasing" when it's not in everyone's best interest, well, courage flies out the door. I've learned and am still cultivating the art of quiet bravery. I've created my own schools of mettle (the inner ability to face tough situations) and grit (hard work that does not quit when things get bad). Truthfully, sometimes I just withdraw for a bit until I've gathered some fortitude. 

Finally, and this is the BIG one: the wisdom to know the difference. As I am officially a Crone and Google says that modern context redefines me as a "wise and powerful elder", I'd like to brag that I always have that wisdom. I don't. However, I have way more now than I did 50 years ago and maybe even 10 years ago. I have a much better sense of which battles are really worth putting on the armor and taking up the sword, and sometimes I have to make a few stands before I pull out the white flag. 

Ultimately, remembering the Serenity Prayer and taking a moment to repeat it is an excellent exercise. It gives pause and creates space in any situation. Whether you're very familiar with it or it's relatively new for you, see if it offers something for you to consider. 

Sending this with Sparkles and Love!